Monday, 25 October 2010


Rather than bore you by recounting ramblings of my rehearsals ready for my Jersey performances I thought I would start somewhere marvellous. Picture the scene: Khandie with some rather lovely friends (some already known and some just met) sipping cocktails in a room full of randoms. Baths piled high with ice…roof top gardens and free cocktails. There were the sterotypical Shoreditch yuppies, RaRas and lurex clad wannabes. Nestled amongst them all were some delightful characters and whilst the cocktails were drunk and some bad dancing occured I had a great time. I loved the fact it was something new for me to experience. I was rather disappointed though as the invite said scantily clad butlers but all I saw were french maids. Not that they werent pretty to look at…just not honed toned males. Damn it.

With some wonderfuls at the party including Rich (editor of and the Dep Editor of Essentials magazine. Nice touch taking polaroids I thought.

I am not sure how I managed to get home as I was slightly drunk. I dont like drinking on a school night and actually vaguely remember getting the wrong train. TWICE! Luckily I was ok by morning so managed to pack all my things ready for Jersey.

Aahhh Jersey my favourite place to perform of late. I love how everyone is delightful and eager to meet you. Just wandering about the town you can see how friendly the people are. This time instead of performing with Fifi Fatale like last time I was joined by the beautiful L.A. lovely Lola LaBelle. She is STUNNING and funny and talented and I want to hate her but cant. I love Lola LaBelle. Laura (producer of the show Decadence Nights) took myself, Lola and Paula (a real doll!) to the Buddhabar for scrummy dinner. Well that was after a short stomp about the town finding somewhere open as the whole place seems to shut about 2pm.

getting my slap on ready for the show.

The show was fantastic as always. No surprise there! No sooner had I finished audience members were demanding to know when I was back. A boost to anyones confidence let me tell you. My latest act ‘Twinkle Toes I Aint’ went down a storm…I even managed to dance the charleston on the bar! With a few photos (roulette wheel based and card throwing inspired) lola and I were sipping champagne and dancing like goons. On the whole a brilliant experience and hopefully one I get to repeat…alot.Shattered though Lola and I retired to our apartment and slept like logs until the morning…when my early morning laughter at the film Frankie and Johnnie woke Lola. Oops but I made her a cup of tea to apologise.

With us both still slightly glittery the lovely Charlene Hickey (fabulous artist) took us for a quick lunch before we were shipped off to the airport.

Now home I am gearing up for an epicly exciting weekend…. Friday I get tattooed again by Lord Garth in Tattoodles in Donington. He is finishing off my hand held mirror crying flapper girl and hopefully (fingers crossed) starting on my next part of my sleeve. Then as soon as that is done I am hightailing it down the motorway back to London to get ready to attend the MCM/Eagles Awards…then Saturday sees me at the MCM convention. If you are going…come say hi! Sunday which is supposedly a day of rest will see me floundering about in the pool again rehearsing for the underwater act. Thankfully my marvel of a costume designer has been working hard on my costume. Cant wait to show you.

so ciao as I am tired.

PS I got asked out for a drink by poem…which was quite sweet.

PPS can you say ‘Khandie on tour’…could soon be a reality!

Relaxing....But Always Working

While a weekend off of performing is meant to be relaxing, I found myself still wokring. With two new acts in development (A new HUGE signature piece and a fun striptease) plus the underwater act still being rehearsed my shopping trip with Big S to Oxford wasnt going to be all pleasure. Admittedly burlesque is a huge pleasure but sometimes even I need a break.

I headed off with Big S early whizzing along the back roads in his new BMW. He likes to show off in it I think. Mind you when he lent it to me to drive to a gig (my car; the normally reliable Tori Spelling on account of the fact its cheap and full of plastic like the real thing, had broken down and was recovering in the garage) I got a little petrol heady about it….

Although I love my best friend so much I nearly threw him out the car when he started to subject me to Frank Sintara over and over again. There is only so much of Old Blue Eyes I can cope with in one journey.

Before long I was sat in a makeup chair with a MAC MUA Lilia ( MUA = Make Up Artist) and together we worked on a new dramatic look for my new routine. Inspired by the new MAC collection Villienous Villiens we came up with a look…and wow!
Excuse the the serious expression!

The make up is just perfect and after a few purchases I left. The rest of the day was spent buying random christmas presents for friends. Ok so I know its early but I spend so much time away from home and travelling that I need to start early.

Back at Big S’s house I spent the rest of the weekend rhinestoning and rehearsing for him to laugh at me. He thinks my new act is rather funny. I wont spoil it too much but its is called ‘Twinkle Toes I aint’….I leave you to ponder what it is all about but think Ginger Rogers with a dash of Charleston and alot of Khandie.

Now back home I am again rehearsing and rhinestoning.

I was sent an image on facebook recently that made me laugh so much I thought I would share it with you. My lovely friend Louise Scott of Lucky LuLu fame (handcrafted accessories…I own and adore the few I have!) posted an image of her beautiful baby Esther posing in a style rather reminscent of a picture I had posted….She is so adorable!!! whilst I on the other hand look like a dork!

Khandie and Esther...I am not sure who wears it better....

Right so a short blog….just not up to much to be honest.

Just to note though if you do see me in the next few days and are alarmed by the bruises to my legs…its because I keep falling over the chair during the rehearsals for my new act. DAMN IT.

Tuesday, 12 October 2010

Oui oui! C'est magnifique!

Wow what a weekend. The Paris Burlesque Festival was the most fun I have had in a long time. Ok so the little hiccup at the start (being left at the train station because my driver was stuck elsewhere) did worry me a little bit as to how it was going to turn out…but the moment I bundled out of the taxi (of which the festival orgainsers immediately paid for!) I was treated with respect, dignity and ensured that my every whim was catered for. The whole event was fabulously wonderful.

Arriving in Paris also meant I got to see an old performer/friend of mine who goes by the name of Ruby Jubilee. She is now living in Paris as an au pair. I have missed her red spiral curls on the circuit and hope she comes back soon. She is a real character and a definite assest to any party as she proved later on in the evening with her distinctive dad dancing style (matched only by Darkteaser and Anne Thropy in the craziness of their Madness sing-a-long session)

My main point of contact was Charlotte and I had yet to meet her but no sooner had I arrived a rather frantic lady (surprised to find she was from England) came running over and threw her arms around me apologizing for the driver not getting to me. She was just like a little doll who was so apologetic there was no way I could be annoyed(not that I was as some lovely hunky French policemen showed me to the taxi rank earlier).

The real shocker for me was when one of my all time favourite performers came over to meet me: Kitten De Ville. I mean this woman is a legend in my books. Her bumps and grinds are the best I have EVER seen! Sadly she caught me mid-dressing and in a rush so I posed with no makeup on or my hair done. I looked a state but who cares. I MET KITTEN DE VILLE. I probably came off as a dork to her but I don’t care as I spoke to her! Whoop.

I also met the art deco doll of UK burlesque Billie Rae. The girl reminds me so much of the Angelique Houtkamp drawings that my tattoos are inspired by (incidentally I am getting a new one on 29th Oct). Her huge bambi like eyes were accentuated by her false eyelashes. I was gutted not to be able to catch her performance considering I had once driven from Southampton to Derby to see her perform once having heard such great things about her. Her boyfriend was such a sweetheart; I could imagine him in safari gear and an elephant gun running around (he has an sense of old England about him.)

Finally I met the wonderful French fancy herself: Miss Anne Thropy. She was my host for my stay in Paris and boy did she live up to it. Already staying with Anne was the truly wonderful LouLou D’Vile. I have to admit for someone clearly so pretty she has no idea how much she brings the room to a standstill. Plus she is crazy to hang out with. LOVE LOVE LOVE her.

Before I had time to catch my breath though I was thrust on stage to a rapturous applause and the crowd, the host (a fantastic Amazonian woman called Juliette Dragon no less) welcomed me like their own. I loved it. Hurry Hurry my showgirl number went down well and even received the compliment of me being called Queen of Tasseling due to my upside down/in a crab tassel twirling…..Rather pleased to receive such a compliment. I ran off stage to more applause.

Of the acts I go to see at that first show (Revue De Paris) each one was fantastic. Two that really stood out for me was the hula hooper who removed garments whilst hula hooping (EVEN TASSELING!!!!) and also the closing act who’s costume removal was very impressive. Her finale with the fire was mesmerizing and well worth waiting for. She had fantastic hair to shaped into chocolate coloured finger waves. It was only later I learnt it was a wig and she was actually a blonde!!!

Before I had time to think though I had to get ready for the next show the Les Nuit Fatales which was in the lower basement area….Now the thought of performing in a basement area conjured up images in my mind of a dark dank hovel but actually it was a great space with lots of lights and room.

The crowd once again were magnificent and cheered and whooped. Dark Before The Dawn seemed a real pleaser. Chuffed I happily collapsed backstage for a well deserved rest. But then I had Anne and LouLou dragging me off to dance and dance we did.

When we went back upstairs we were able to watch the rest of the acts in the basement area perform on the big screen. (a great idea!!!) so whilst sipping (more guzzling mojitos) Philly Cara Mel, Starla Haze (didn’t perform but came to see us all), Darkteaser, Anne Thropy, LouLou D’Vile etc were all partying hard and posing for photos upstairs. It was only then that I realized that the actual stage I had first performed on was designed like a big top with stripes on the walls and ceiling plus oodles of tigers/cages/ lions adorning the wall. Even the odd photo (rather good photo might I add) of a local photographer’s pinup work. I even spotted the famous Dirty Martini’s image up there. YUMMY!

I found Dirty Martini!

The rest of the night consisted of partying and meeting lots of new people. It was wonderful when audience members came up to congratulate me and the other performers on our acts and I loved how many went out of their way to do this. Talk about an ego trip! Hahaha. Amongst the crowd was the cutie pie Brooklyn Baby Doll, Miss Glitter Painkiller and lots of other performers from the festival who stayed on to party. The night went on well into the morning and involved abusing a sleeping acrobat…and a trip to McDonalds with Franny that nearly saw us kicked out…who knew they had such overzealous security in Parisian McDonalds at 8am…plus they don’t serve breakfast! Having a burger (minus the bun as wheat intolerant) was not the best breakfast I have had and nor do I recommend it.

Antics backstage with a sleeping Herve...oops never sleep at the festival! LOL

After lugging my massive coffin (suitcase) half way across Paris and up millions (ok maybe not that much) of stairs I crashed into bed at Anne’s glamorous apartment with LouLou at about 9am….oh how rock n roll.

By 5pm the next day though we were all back at the venue for the Burlesque Bazaar to see what was for sale. I purchased a necklace in the shape of lips…naturally. We partied somewhat with the help of more mojitos at the performers party but cried off early as we were shattered and went for a meal with Anne’s boyfriend at a restaurant in the Pigalle. YUMMY food!!

After a feeble attempt to watch Kung Fun Panda we all went to bed early…ish about 1am.

The next morning both LouLou and I departed Paris and headed back to our respective homes….both sad to be leaving. Though lots of awesome memories and plans to return.

Now I am home I determined to crack on with my burlesque more than ever! I am working hard in preparation for my show in Jersey this weekend…3 acts to be performed. BRING IT ON!

Friday, 8 October 2010

Paris Prep? Done!

Ok so a real short blog post to say I am all packed for Paris FINALLY. I have packed and repacked that suitcase so many times. Everything including the stars fit in which is a wonder in itself given that they are HUGE! I have rhinestoned anything missing some and have triple checked all costuming! I am ready!

The coffin aka my giant suitcase. It in fact fits me and Tempest-Rose inside it together!

So I am off to bed before these nerves kick in and ruin it all for me. I am not sure when i post next....I have a lovely mate housesitting for me whilst I am away as I am worried one of my beloved fish is sick....I am a loser I know but I love my fish though admittedly not enough to cancel my trip to Paris for it...oops.

I am sad that I am not sharing this whole experience with someone but I know that I have mates already at the festival so they will more than make up for it. I am nervous about venturing into Paris on my own....I have been before but still...I speak all of 4ish words of French which makes me feel incredibly ignorant.

Right to bed! Night night darlings!

P.S. SQUEAL! i am so excited I wonder if I will manage to sleep???

Gack, Goon and Gross

So the last few days have not gone to plan to say the least. With the Paris Burlesque Festival mere days away I was hoping the run up to it would be smooth and thus help me to relax (I am so excited to see Anne Thropy and Kitten DeVille again!) but it seemed that nature was conspiring against me and I ended up coming down with some filthy evil cold/cough thing that was determined to make my life hell on Earth for a while.

Once again I was in Bournemouth over the weekend having decided to take a break from manic performing/rehearsing/general craziness and for once attend a show. I found myself too sick to participate in much at the show so spent much of time passed out on the floor of Andy Breaks (of shop floor. The event was the first of Battistinis Revival nights and surrounded by hot rods, vintage clad audience members and the smell of leather I would normally be in heaven if it wasn’t for the cold/flu/devil thing. With the Kitty Kat Kittens performing and Light n Shade singing plus Howard from the Regular Joes Annie and the Battistinis crowd put on a good show with only a few hiccups.
Battistinis Revival Night...more to come!

It was a lovely chance to catch up with my old friends the Pandora’s Choice team who were selling some rather lovely lingerie. I have my eye on some seamless panties and gown….fingers crossed I can get them soon as they are to die for.

As well as the usual Kitty Kat Kittens performing they had invited my lovely friend Miss Anticipation to perform (my sexy Elvis impersonator!). She went down a storm which is something that always happens. I whooped and cheered the best my silly croaky voice would allow.

Another lovely surprise was to see my friend and ex-BlueBelle Jane White…she came back to perform with the kittens after leaving the area some months ago. That woman has legs and rhythm to die for and I often tell her!!!

I sadly didnt take any photos as I was too poorly to really pay much attention. I just pootered about and occasionally danced. Annie was on her fabulous form as usual and her singing did help lift my woeful mood. I love Annie she is as cute as a button with a voice that is just as delightful as she is.

One highlight of the night was Howard singing acapella when the sound system packed up. Hands clapped and people cheered him on. A real trooper who is a dishy mix of Cary Grant and Michael Buble but without the drama.

Oh and KK even got to dance with a rather dashing gentleman…ok so we spent much of the dance pratting around but considering how sick I was feeling I had a blast.

I am thinking of going to the next one as I do like it there…plans are even afoot for me to do a photoshoot there soon…oh I say! Plus being loaned a few swish hot rods to play about on.

The Sunday was spent with me sniffing much and feeling generally miserable. Though one bright moment was taking my beloved Tempest-Rose on Boscombe beach for some fresh air. I do love my Auntie KK duties. Watching her giggle and chase the sea foam made me feel better….

Tempest-Rose on Boscombe Beach!

Infectious giggles!

She played with the sea foam and laughed with me at the surfers attempting to wade out…but the wind picked up and I was starting to feel rough again so we trooped off home….well back to Christchurch.

Sickly pale and putting on a brave face

Tempest and I! Aaahhh

Before long I had to be back in London…where the cold took a more sinister turn that resulted in me being in hospital for a chest scan and being perscribed two lots of antibiotics after the first course had no effect. I am however happy to report I am well on the road to recovery and eagerly waiting to get on that Eurostar to Paris to perform. I am also excited to see Ruby Jubilee/Catherine Pearson who now lives in Paris…I am bringing her Bisto chicken gravy granules….apparently she ‘needs’ them. I adore her. Will post lots of images of my Parisian adventures as soon as I can.


PS the entries for the Khandie Khisses Inspired Artwork comp (see here for details are coming in thick and fast. Here is a sneaky peek at one of the entrants Miss Emma Mason:
Competition Entry Emma Mason!

PPS New costumes are being planned with my beloved Vintage Lynndy Loo….That woman is one hell of a costumier! I trust her completely!